Paper Cut
by SirenBleedsInsanity
Summary: Miranda's POV. PG-13 for suicidal themes. I don't like Miranda anymore than I used to, mind you!! I haven't seen a fic starring the Sacred Sister ever, so I thought I'd try to be creative ^.^ R&R! (kinda angsty, more dramatic)


~*-_Paper Cut_-*~  
  
  
__________________________________________  
Discomfort endlessly has pulled itself upon me  
Distracting  
Reacting  
Against my will I stand beside my own reflection  
It's haunting  
How I can't seem  
To find myself again  
My walls are closing in  
[Without a sense of confidence and I'm convinced  
There's just too much pressure to take]  
I've felt this way before  
So insecure  
  
~Linkin Park  
_________________________________________  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
I still don't like Miranda. In fact, I originally wasn't planning to write this about *her*; she just seemed the most.....likely drawn to it.....wouldn't you think? Anyways, just to make sure; she's very sarcastic in the beginning. It's in her POV, by the way. R&R, and I don't normally write like this...or at least I don't think so...do I? Heh, oh well. Enjoy, if you can bring yourself to!  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"Annoying Miranda?"  
  
I'm so sorry, I just thought I would live today. Didn't mean to breathe your air. Allow me to be a perfect little angel with no personality whatsoever as my apology.  
  
I "slap people around too much?"  
  
Oh, I was only abused and abandoned as a young child, so of course I should be expected not to develop the habit, myself. No, it's just the way I was taught to deal with anger, so there's really no reason at all that I would tend to react with my hand. I simply have mercy and don't go near as far as I could, as far as my mother and her roses did. Thank you so much for considering that "bitchy."  
  
I'm "rude and inconsiderate?"  
  
Yeah. That's it. I can talk, oh, no, we're all gonna die now. I'm tough,  
(yet weak...)  
not heartless. I *do* have feelings, and it hurts  
(like hell)  
to be insulted. Deny it, then, say you've never thought lowly of me. I know, either way. I'm not an idiot.   
  
And I'm *not* heartless. Just tell me why I should care for people when people don't care for me.  
  
Well, I'm sorry. Okay? I'm not proud of who I am, but give me some credit. Would you rather me act, pretend to be a whole new person? Rather me lie, and hide myself from the world? Or rather me be gone for good? Be happy that I almost was. Plenty of times.  
  
See this scar on my wrist? And there's one right next to it, and another, and plenty others on the opposite...thin. White. Tender. *There*.  
  
If you ask, it's just a paper cut. You'll believe me.  
  
Too much.  
  
Prick.  
  
Trickle.  
  
Pain.  
  
...  
  
Bandage. I can't go through with it. But would you be happier if I did? Rose? Beautiful, strong, graceful Rose? You're dead now....would a smile spread across your flawless face if I joined you?  
  
Everyone....I don't know. You just pretend to accept me. Pity, is it?  
  
That still doesn't change anything.  
  
I'm the annoying one. The problem. I can tell just from how you look at me. You want to like me...I run my eyes around the room...innocent Shana, energetic Meru, intelligent Albert....You guys tried. Failed.   
  
Well...  
  
I suppose *I* failed. I failed at being a decent person. Failed at being who I should be.  
  
Failed at being a good friend.  
  
Failed at being perfect.   
  
What about the others? Persistent Dart, good-humored Haschel, warm Kongol....What would you say if you knew? I could tell you. Ask for help. But would you be willing? *What if you knew*?  
  
But I don't want you to know.  
  
...So I won't tell you.  
  
Nightfall.  
  
Slash.  
  
Drop.  
  
Sting.  
  
....Stain of blood on my shirt....  
  
Heal. Still. I don't know why I do this. It's all quite depressing, knowing how you talk about me, knowing that I don't really have any true friends...maybe that's why. I guess I just need to prove myself to you, once and for all.  
  
Am I so annoying now?  
  
Day by day.....you finally noticed. Moon Child and King of Serdio, you saw. Concern on your face, is that it? I knew I shouldn't have taken my gloves off.  
  
Too late.  
  
There was no need to fetch Mr. Big Strong Leader. He doesn't know the difference from a slash to a prick. Paper cut. I told you that.  
  
I knew you would believe me.  
  
Some odd form of concern spread through our little tie of friends after that. You watched me carefully. But....either way....you still think the same of me. Why wouldn't you?  
  
Don't get too close. People scare me. So does their pity. Pity for the poor, inconsiderate Sacred Sister.  
  
Exactly how Sacred am I to you? How sacred, after finding out that I'm me, and I can't change that?  
  
...So a few new cuts turn up. It doesn't mean anything, guys.  
  
Really.  
  
Don't worry.   
  
I just tried to take my life.   
  
It's your fault I can't.  
  
So get over it.  
  
I'm still the same unbearable me.  
  
With a slit on my wrist.  
  
But trust me.  
  
It's just a paper cut.  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
Ooooooh, freakishness! It was really weak and crappy, too! But anyway, did anyone else see Miranda as kind of insecure and having low self-esteem, deep inside at least? She's had quite a tragic life, so suicidal tendencies, depression and everything...that doesn't seem surprising from someone who's been abused, does it (Just guessing...)? She can't be all high and mighty after her mom just says "Well, Miranda, I met a new man, so we're just gonna run away and leave you here with no sign of regret or pain at all, so toodles!" Though the way we found out about her being abused and everything was kinda weak.....*looks back and forth, suddenly nervous* But I still don't like her! Don't get me wrong! Just thought I'd try to be creative! So, review...don't sugar-coat it, but don't be too harsh...ya know what I mean? *snaps fingers and points in triumph* Be /honest/, that's it! Sooooo yeah. Hope I did okay! (WEAK! IT WAS BADLY((?)) WEAK! AGH!)  
~*~*~*~*~*~ 


End file.
